I am sitting on my deck in my back yard, thinking how lucky I am my neighbor decided that this would be the right time, this peaceful time to be using a freaking belt sander. Its so loud!
Yes that was sarcasm 
Yet while I sit here on my deck I can put in headphones and listen to music or a fantastic podcast while I feel so grateful for my life. I am so proud of myself. I know I have worked hard.
Yet…
That pang, that yearning to be there at my destination so I can enjoy it now, without the workload or stress. All the social media following that i am trying to learn, because with a following, we have a way to move information. To be seen on all kinds of platforms, IS HARD. Yes, trying to remember all the platforms to post on, trying to remember all the new trends.
Last week I wrote about frustration and realized after I posted that I had written about frustration before. So here are both posts summarized.
Some reasons for frustrations
- Anger
- Self doubt
- Playing the victim
- Perfectionism
- Magnifying the problem
- Quitting
For a more insightful thoughts on these, read my previous post on Reasons for Frustration.
Now ways to combat frustration in no particular order.
- Try and stay flexible and informal
- Do not be so hard on yourself
- Stay positive and be around positive people
- Always try
- Be consistent and
- Do not give up
- Have a plan
- Remember that mistakes help you grow
- Seek help when you need it
- Excuses get you no where
So, where’s my growth in all this? 
I find that social media is habit forming. Almost like brushing your teeth. The hard stuff is knowing what and how. The growth is showing up and trying something every day. Not being afraid of yourself. Remembering that one’s opinion is just that, an opinion. So I remind myself.
Now I grew up in a fixed mindset household and even though nothing was out of malicious intent but rather, just not knowing that there were other ways of thinking.
A fixed mindset is where our personality is reflected by a stagnant ability to creativity, a set of preconceived ideas that we cannot change. That change in a meaningful way, could end up in failure and we would want to avoid that at all costs. Success and a fixed ‘standard’, keeps us in maintenance mode.
Growth mindset is where we step into the uncomfortable to create change. Where we thrive in learning about ourselves and others, to live our happiest selves.
I can honestly say that I have been in many situations where I think in a fixed mindset. I am of course striving to stay in the growth mindset. I find it a lot of work still as it not a natural way of thinking for me. The problem is when I stay in a fixed state, and I use excuses to avoid or procrastinate learning a new skill, it blocks me from the growth I so want.
I do not want to fail. I know I am not perfect, and this is the weird thing, I know this, yet stay stuck.
I even find myself saying out loud that I have to do, A, B or C and in the same breath say, I just do not know how to do it and it takes so long to learn, and this gardening (or whatever other project there is on the go) needs to get done first.
Excuses
When I find myself thinking in the fixed mindset, I start to fall into the procrastination phase where my disrupted relationship with time becomes very apparent.
In the growth mindset, I say show up every day,
and I say this in every blog post,
and
I tell myself this regularly so that I can engrain this thinking into my brain waves,
the thoughts of failure that hold me back, become,
thoughts of persistence and effort.
I read this amazing article, you will see the link below, by James Clear and he has outlined some research about how beliefs can hold you back.
It is so true. I have been thinking about this for years and the whole reason for the blog. How we think, what we believe, how we behave, can either help us or hinder us. Clear nails it!
As I go through this journey of learning how my thoughts reflect my actions and behavior, I realized that the two different mindsets can, as said above, help you or hold you back.
Repetitive, positive behavior, habit forming
I was posting about frustration, and I realized that yes, I have been frustrated, yet that’s part of the process. I need to keep focusing on the schedule I put forth and remind myself to show up every day, always try, and never give up. Results will come.
Thanks for reading. The mind is a powerful tool and it can help you build your identity into growth mindset habits. Do not let negative fixed mindset, define you.
in the meantime, stay real, stay positive, and always show up
