So I am wondering why I felt so compelled to get showered and put on daytime clothes, rather than just having my coffee in my pajamas and writing all comfy.
My first thought was a question actually, Why does this bother me? To get dressed I mean.
Is there A reason I would even need to think that getting dressed was a weird thing to do on a Sunday?
WHAT THEN…
Some how along the way, staying home and staying in your pajamas meant one was comfortable in their own skin and in their own environment. It also allowed me to ask myself, How would just being comfy in my pajamas and not being busy feel? Why do I think I need to do this in order to have the feeling I want? What feeling do I want?
I want the feelings to be relaxed, calm, peaceful, stress free, and positive.
I recently posted a saying from Mark Manson’s book, ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck‘ ;
Wanting a positive experience is a negative experience; accepting negative experience is a positive experience. (Manson, pg.9)
As I say this out loud, I am processing the situation and identifying the feeling. Once I realize that the feeling is negative I then can identify this minuscule problem and think about what I might do to change the outcome.
In this case, my feelings around wearing the pajamas verses getting dressed. 3 questions I ask myself.
1.] So what outcome do i want to have?
2.] Why is this important at this time?
3.] In order to have the outcome I want, what do I need to do?
SELF AWARENESS is KEY
Well, I want to be able to feel inspired and sit and blog because blogging makes me feel relaxed and happy, so I will do this. I woke up with huge, I mean HUGE bags and dark circles under my eyes, so I decided that when I looked at myself I had negative thoughts, so I washed my face and put on my timeless serums, and added my cover-ups, and blended it all in. No mascara, just the bags and dark circles since this was the issue. And you know what? I felt immediately better about myself and my mood shifted to positive.
DECISION MAKING SKILLS
I decided to get dressed because it was a day I needed to feel inspired because of my own personal goal of productivity and what that meant for me today. If I wore pajamas all morning at this time, it actually meant, I would rather curl up on the couch and watch a movie with a blanket and some chocolate. I had a goal for today and in order to feel motivated to achieve this goal, I needed to get dressed because i felt better about myself, this giving me the confidence I needed. For me, it was the strategy to get me writing and feeling inspired.
In hindsight I think if I had some new pajamas this could be a new goal worth achieving.
Now, here’s another question? How are you teaching your kids, teens, and yourself, critical thinking skills?
Honestly I really want to teach my boys how to have critical thinking skills, and so how do I teach them if I am still learning myself?
PARENTING SKILLS TO HELP US
SCENERIO: I recently was presented with a situation at work where two different styles of critical thinking skills were presented in a classroom filled with elementary kids 8 and 9 years old. Although both styles were effective both were different. One style was more awareness of feeling and bringing awareness to the situation, the other was to let the feeling be presented and let the child work it out themselves. If the child is crying and throwing a tantrum, other children are able to regulate and control their outburst, then teach the majority and tend to the single child, after. Hopefully teaching the child to self regulate and also realize that negative behaviour will not condone a response. Once the child has calmed down a tad, we can then intervene with acknowledgement of the feelings that were hard, and praise the feelings of achievement of being able to work through feelings that were hard.
4 STEPS IM USING TO HELP WITH CRITICAL THINKING SKILLS
1. Provide hands on opportunities for kids and teens to play and/or have a problem that needs to be solved.
2. Do not jump in to a rescue right away. Allow these young people to think, so give them time to process.
3. Presentation is everything. If we struggle getting inspired, how do we expect to encourage young people to get inspired
4. You can ask the 5 W’s and H questions. What is this you ask?
WHO
WHAT
WHERE
WHEN
WHY
HOW
REMEMBER TO GIVE YOURSELF AND YOU|R KIDS TIME to THINK
By allowing our kids to think, we are allowing them to be self aware, and conscious of what they are doing. our young people are so used to having answers right away by either googling it or asking before they even have given themselves a chance to figure it out. Therefore if a solution can’t be found right away, they give up. This is exactly what we don’t want them doing. So asking lots of why questions and open ended questions in general to get them thinking outside the box.
So while I observe, step back, and acknowledge that I may have asked the open ended questions, I may have not stepped back enough, and therefore blocked the process of critical thinking.
BE GRATEFUL AND HAVE GRATIDTUDE FOR WHAT YOU ALREADY KNOW
I am so grateful for the ability to have these opportunities to observe and learn and at the same time learn something new.
I am listing the styles I learned about that help young people with developing brains stretch their thinking. I want young people to not be so hard on themselves when something doesn’t go right, rather acknowledge that they feel disappointed and that is OK. Critical thinking skills are there for us to ask questions and inquire with more problem solving techniques. They are there to help realize your belief and develop action.
Now, what are we going to do to change our mindset?
I, have an adult brain, and find myself developing it often. So these lists and strategies are something I use for myself too.
Let me know in the comments below if you learned something new or were able to view your own critical thinking skills in a different light. Please ask questions if something was unclear and/or you are curious. I would love to hear all your opinions when genuine.
Here are some articles I found helpful and easy to understand.
https://www.skillsyouneed.com/learn/critical-thinking.html
https://collegeinfogeek.com/improve-critical-thinking-skills/
In the meantime, stay real, stay positive and never give up.